Electric Zebra electronic cigarettes

Electronic cigarettes have been in the news recently – with one vaping wally on a coach managing to cause a terror alert on the M6 toll road, by blowing his gaseous discharge into a plastic bag giving fellow passengers the heebie-jeebies.

But this blog post aims to paint the contraptions in a more positive light.

You see the problem is he was trying to hide what he was doing – although Lord knows why since 'vaping' on public transport is perfectly legal.

Perhaps our H2-doh! breather was puffing on one which looked indistinguishable from a real ciggie and was eager to not alert the overzealous eyes of the 'smokefree' elf 'n' safety Stasi.

This would not have been a problem had our hero been happily inhaling an Electric Zebra.

For the Elec-Zeb's USP is it's distinctiveness – namely it's zebra stripes and green glowing LED 'cherry'.

I'd defy even the dumbest anti-terror Plod to mistake this otherworldly machine for an actual cigarette.

Though, despite their anti-cig aesthetics, Electric Zebra sure does taste like the real thing.

With menthol, US tobacco and UK tobacco flavours in their arsenal they have all smokers' bases covered.

And they can be plugged into the mains to recharge or a USB port in your PC.

Personally I prefer the menthol variety, which pack a satisfying punch in the throat, without all the carcinogenic nasties prevalent in those things that contain that stuff Sir Walter Raleigh brought back, in the world's first duty free trip abroad.

All of which means these Zebras won't leave you feeling horse (sorry, hoarse).

The wallet-friendly gaspers work out cheaper than conventional cigarettes too, with disposables at £4.95 (equal to 20 cigarettes) and rechargeable starter packs at £25.95, including a free case and five refill cartridges (each equal to 20 cigarettes).

The stylish packaging also features a stubble-faced chap who has got the girl too, making smoking as cool as it was when Sean Connery's James Bond sparked up a fag at a card table.

The name's Freeloader, Shameless Freeloader.

Electric Zebras look a bit like something Bond's gadget man “Q” would cook up too!

For more info, go to www.electriczebra.com

Do you have a product I can freeload? Email shamelessfreeloader@hotmail.co.uk

Hugo is the Boss of pretty puny freebies!

Usually I like to use this site to wax lyrical about some fabulous freebie I've managed to blag through my capacity as the most shameless of freeloaders.

But, on this occasion I have to be slightly critical.

Great though it is to get unsolicited freebies, I really must protest at the frankly skinflintedness of one of the world's leading scent manufacturers.

Sadly not actual size!

 Forgive me for biting a hand that is feeding me, but a postcard with Orlando Bloom on it (good thing he was labelled as I'd not have recognised his grinning visage without him badly attempting to shoot a bow and arrow), with 0.075ml (0.0025 fl oz) of aftershave appended to it, does not a good freebie make!

I could barely do that wrist-rubbing thing with this drop of pungent parfum!

Although, judging by the postmark, perhaps Hugo exhausted his marketing budget by mailing this particular Bloom-a-gram from Hong Kong.

This is to date the worst freebie I've received, but oddly, in it's sheer triviality it occupies a fond place in my own pantheon of pointlessness.

If anyone from Hugo Boss is reading this and would like me to seriously review your products, obviously in exchange for more than a postage stamp-sized portion, please get in touch: shamelessfreeloader@hotmail.co.uk

deadmau5 at Wireless Festival, Hyde Park

Animal-headed deities supposedly went out with the Ancient Eqyptians, but there I was in Hyde Park last week enjoying a positively religious experience, dancing to a small man with a mouse's head.

Or should that be mau5head?

For the scrawny chap conducting this pumping paganistic party was the one and only deadmau5.

I had come up trumps in the freeloading department once again as two shiny tickets arrived for the BarclayCard Wireless Festival on July 6th.

Torrential rain had rendered the park a tad muddy – but as this was only the first day of a three-day festival, I was quite pleased to give my £6 Wellington boots a rare and not too punishing airing.

Prior to the retired-from-life rodent, Knife Party proved a popular and banging alternative in the Pepsi Max Arena to Roots, who performed to near ambivalence on the Main Stage (clearly acoustic hip-hop wasn't the best choice warm-up material for deadmau5... who'd of thunk of it?!).

Fans of banging bladed bonhomie were not disappointed as the DJ duo smashed it, with a fast-paced combo of house, trance, electro and dubstep.

As the sun began to set over the park mau5 fans (and a group of lads dressed as Kermit the Fog) scurried to the now Roots-vacated Main Stage for the arrival of 'Le Souri5 Mort'.

And what a set he played; Raise Your Weapon, Sofi Needs a Ladder and Moar Ghosts N Stuff were highlights of a stunning audiovisual spectacle.

This was not the first time I've seen deadmau5 for free either... it's my third, and on this form all I can say is long may the freebies continue!

Do you have something I can freeload in exchange for a preview or review? Email shamelessfreeloader@hotmail.co.uk and follow on Twitter @thefreeloader1